I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
