he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
