Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
