oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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