found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
