found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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