Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Randomize
