Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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