was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
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The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
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there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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