so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
