I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
