do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
