We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
