My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
