TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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