I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
