my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
