is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
