this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i drank out of a bidet.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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