is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
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