We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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