I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
