Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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