I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
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I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
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Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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