it wasn't lemon gatorade
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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