break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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