I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
