And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
