when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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