I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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