Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
