I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
