Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Rumble strips road head = magical
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
