Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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