haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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