This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
