I love black thongs
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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