NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
