im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
