I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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