Girls should come with a carfax report
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
