At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I just want to make out with him forever
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
