i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
