I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
