Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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