Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
are you so shy because you have an std?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
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