I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize
