I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
