Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
