we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
