his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
