Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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