is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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